yawns in face cause done with your shit

bueno:

will u still snapchat me when i am no longer young and beautiful

(Source: prettylittletmi)

egberts:

why are male products always advertised humorously and female product ads are always doey and sexualized. i wanna see a humorous ad for like leg shaving cream. just random pictures of legs for the entire commercial and a picture of the shaving cream at the end with the caption “wanna feel my legs?”

foxnewsofficial:

why do porn websites have a +1 button i don’t want everyone to know i actually use google plus

(Source: foxnewsofficial)

"It’s a long story."

"It’s one that I know well. When I was a boy, my father and I boarded a ship with plans to travel the realms. One morning I awoke and he was gone. It turned out he was a fugitive. He fled in the middle of the night to avoid capture."

(Source: hookmate)

lorde-oftherings:

texasnwhiskey:

danthemedicman:

dancybutt:

"what state do you live in?"

constant anxiety

Denial

Perfection

Florida

fjordism:

AARON PAUL JUST POSTED THIS ON TWITTER AND I’M SHITTING

snapchatting:

i decided to name him Father, after my father

zeeday:

timmypuddin:

*picks the hottest cashier at the grocery store*

image

(Source: timmyturntner)

catliketendencies:

the one that got away aka the hot person you saw while you were with your parents

©joshdevin

Neko